Lilly finished rinsing the splotches of paint from her hands and arms, then wiped them down with a dry cloth. As she came out, William was just coming down the stairs with his own rag, drying off his face.
“No fair getting my nose. I couldn’t get it all off.”
An outline of dried paint still ringed the appendage.
“It’s your fault. You shouldn’t have brushed my arm.” She pointed to the edge of her shirt where the blue stained the material.
He shrugged. “Are you hungry? We can eat here, or we can go out for a late lunch?”
“Are you asking me on a date?” She grinned, expecting some sort of comeback to her barb.
“Yes, I think I am.” He dropped the rag to his side. “Lilly Raey, will you go on a date with me?”
“I think I need to take another shower first.” Lilly hurried from the room.
Her clothes had gone through the wash throughout the day, but they were still piled on top of her suitcase, waiting to either be folded or at least stuffed and zipped inside. She sorted through them looking for the dress she wanted to wear.
William followed her into the laundry room. “I did promise you swimming. If you’re still interested, we could do that first and then head out, or we can get food and then come back, whatever you prefer.”
Lilly pulled her dress from the pile and hid her unmentionables behind her back. “Either way. I’m kind of starving, but the pool would be nice.”
“I’m starving too. Food first, play after.”
The way he said it sent shivers through her and the butterflies erupted for the third time in five minutes. “Are you serious?”
“About the pool? Yeah, of course I am. What’s the use in keeping the PH levels right if I never use it?”
“I mean about going on a date.”
William’s smile turned shy. “I think I am. I can’t get you out of my head. You’re smart, creative, funny, talented, willing to work, kind, and forgiving. Everything I’ve been looking for.”
“And young.”
“Yeah, but at least you’re not a minor.” He turned. “I think I’ll take a shower too.”
Lilly floated through her preparations, still in denial about the whole affair. Hadn’t she just told Pamela yesterday that she had no chance with the man? As she glided into the main front foyer, William waited for her in a simple pair of denim jeans and a polo shirt. His hair spiked in its normal wild manner. As she came in close, Lilly could smell the same scent that graced her pillow.
“You look nice.”
“You look divine.” He stretched out a hand and took hers when she accepted it, spinning her lightly. “That’s a beautiful dress.”
He led the way to the garage and after moving the dried head-in-the-hole frames to the side, he opened her door and helped her into the sedan. Lilly remained in awe, and just kept glancing at him as they drove.
He gave her a couple of sideways glances before breaking the silence. “What’s going on?”
“I’m just trying to understand, I guess. When we kissed, you practically ran from the room, but now you’re asking me out. What changed?”
“I didn’t run because I was unhappy, I ran because it was a bit of a shock to my system. I think I mentioned that I haven’t dated anyone for about ten years, so finding you is unexpected for me. I’m happy though.”
He reached over and squeezed her hand.
“You needed a little time to digest?”
“And to get over the age gap.” He glanced at her. “I’ll be honest, it’s still throwing me for a bit of a loop. I feel like I’m skirting the law just going out with you.”
“You don’t see me as a woman?”
“Oh, believe me, that’s not the problem. I guess I was one of those guys who saw an age gap as large as ours and judged the couple harshly. I mean, I know that there’s love in some of those relationships, but more often than not, it feels like it’s for some other reason. He’s an old lecher, or she’s after his money or something.”
“Wow, that’s really judgmental.”
“I did start with that,” he defended.
“And now?”
“And now I’m beginning to see that perhaps stalking can get you what you want.” He grinned and gave her hand another squeeze. “I hope you’re okay with my sudden change?”
“I’m still debating.” She said honestly. “I still like you, but you’re not the guy I had kind of built up in my mind.”
“Yeah, I saw your list.”
“What?” It was like he’d broken into her private diary.
“You left it open on the couch. I went in to show my parents that you’d slept there and it was open on the ground. I only read a couple of items, but then my mom grabbed it from me and read the whole list aloud.”
“Oh jeeze.” Her face burned all the way to the tips of her ears. “Oh jeeze, that’s terrible! Why didn’t you stop her?”
“What was I supposed to do, dive on her? Your list was definitely a wish-list, and I don’t think I’m that guy, but it did convince me that I wanted to find out who you were.”
Lilly dropped her head into her free hand, embarrassed beyond measure. “I feel like a total idiot. I made that list years ago, back when I was in high school.”
“High school?”
She told him about the first time she’d seen him, and her thoughts on each successive visit. She also came clean about how many time she’s sat outside his house watching the lights until they all vanished. By the end she could see that he was slightly put out. “But you stalked me too, right? So we’re square?”
“I followed you around for one day, Lilly, not for years. It’s a tad different.” He pulled into the parking lot of an Italian restaurant and found a spot near the front. “Have you ever stalked anyone else?”
“No. The moment I saw you, there was no other man in the world. I think I was even dating someone at the time. I can’t tell you what happened to our relationship, I honestly don’t even remember breaking it off.”
“That’s quite the obsession.”
Lilly shrugged. “I know what I want.” She opened her door as he grunted. She didn’t have the right shoes, but her sandals matched well enough, and they were easier to deal with than the stilettos she normally wore. “I’ve never been here before.”
William’s hand slipped into hers. “It’s one of my favorite places. No Sampson’s hair, but still pretty good.”
The meal was, as he said, pretty good. Lilly chose the four-cheese stuffed ravioli and William chose the triple sampler. As they ate, he grilled her almost as thoroughly as his sister had, delving into areas she wasn’t sure she wanted to share with Pamela, much less William, but each time she answered his questions, she felt a sense of peace, as if bearing her soul was somehow freeing her from a prison she’d never understood. By the dessert course his questions were lagging and she took up the reigns. “We’ll start easy. Favorite color?”
“Black.”
“Black? That’s not even a color!”
“Fine, super dark grey to the point of being black.”
“Cheater.”
“Next?” He lifted a spoon to his lips and licked it in a way that made her want to jump across the table.
“Uh,” she tried to collect her thoughts. “Favorite animal?”
“Stingray.”
“What?”
“You want a mammal? Fine, a bat.”
“You’re so odd.”
“I didn’t make comments. I just asked questions.”
“Well, I’m not you.” She pushed in her spoon and watched the dark chocolate ooze from her molten cake. “Favorite holiday?”
“New Years.”
“Favorite time of year?”
“That’s hard. I love spring because the blossoms bloom and the world wakes up. I love summer because the days are longer and I feel like the world is open to explore. I love fall because it’s filled with rainstorms and the power of nature at its fullest. I love winter, because in the mountains, when the snow is newly fallen, it feels like a different world. Something quiet and fresh.”
“Fair enough, though that’s still cheating. How about socks. Do you like ankle cut, those hidden ones, or the full-on tube socks?”
“Either hidden, or the tight dress socks. I don’t know why, but they just hug my leg and that makes me happy.”
“So weird.” She pushed the plate across to him and watched him take another bite before he passed it back. “Okay, boxers or briefs?”
“Is the strict sense in which you’re asking, neither.”
“Ah, commando?” She grinned at him.
William laughed. “Not quite. My turn?”
“No way! Favorite ice cream?”
“Vanilla.”
“French, Bean, or plain?”
“Depends on the brand, but French.”
“What toppings?”
“No toppings. I mean, I can drizzle on a little chocolate, but I love it plain.”
“Plain.” The concept was foreign. “I don’t know if this is going to work.”
“Sure it will. I take it you love toppings? So whenever I get a cherry on my dessert, you can eat it as long as I can watch.”
“Hmm, I can see that.” She scraped the last bite from the plate. “Favorite type of shoe: dress, tennis, boot, or sandal.”
“Of those four, I would have to say sandal.”
“Oh, me too.”
The waiter started to set down the check, but William produced his debit card from thin air and handed it to the man.
Lilly frowned. “Please don’t tell me you’re one of those traditionalists who believes a woman needs to be coddled and then kept in the home?”
“Coddled, no. Spoiled, yes. But I expect to be spoiled in return. That’s the way my parents have always lived. My father says that as long as he’s looking out for her needs, and she’s looking out for his, both sides are taken care of, and often better than they would have done for themselves.”
Lilly contemplated this as the waiter returned with their ticket and he led her back to the car. For the ride home, she pushed the thought into the back of her mind and started back in on her questions. As soon as they pulled to a stop William exited the car and hurried around to her side. Lilly knew what he wanted, but she stubbornly opened the door herself anyway. Her date took it all in stride and simply held it until she’d gotten out, then closed it behind her.
“Are you still up for swimming tonight?”
She thought of how she would look, stuffed as she felt. “Maybe another night?”
“Perfect. Would you like to do something else, or did you need to go back to your place? Hopefully she got the power turned back on.”
Lilly didn’t answer until they’d slipped inside. As he turned to look at her, she stepped in close. “I had a lot of fun tonight.”
“Me too.” He murmured.
She could see him steeling himself, gathering his nerves. Lilly waited patiently until he was ready, then accepted his kiss, melting into him. He tried to cut it short, but she didn’t let him, nibbling on his bottom lip so that he returned to the kiss.
“Lilly.” He groaned. “Please don’t.”
“Don’t what?” She felt a strange hurt at his words. What had she done now?
“You drive the logic and thoughts right out of my head.” He gave the same shy smile. “I enjoy it, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t want to rush anything.”
She felt her enthusiasm for the night dwindle. “Does that mean I won’t get to see what your bedroom looks like?”
William cleared his throat. “No, nor are you likely to see that any time soon.”
“What? Does this have to do with the age gap again?” She huffed, starting to pull away.
“No.” His hands tightened, refusing to let her slip away. “Nothing to do with that at all. It’s a religious thing.” He dipped down again, starting another kiss and another slow burn in her belly.
Lilly’s fingers teased at the edge of his shirt, seeking the skin beneath, but she only found another layer. Annoyed, she tugged at the shirt, but William’s hand locked over hers. “No. Off limits. Alright, let’s have the conversation.”
He pulled her gently toward the back living room. Her sheets and pillow still lay on the couch, but he tossed them to one side and gestured for her to sit. Settling himself in the next seat, he turned his whole body and curled his legs up. Lilly wanted to do the same, but her dress wasn’t quite long enough, or stretchy enough for that style, so she made do with a forty-five degree angle to him.
“Okay. Here’s the deal. Have you ever heard of Latter-Day Saints? Or the LDS Church?”
Lilly paled. “No way. That’s you?” She should have known. She’d heard stories and seen the young men in shirts and ties, but always managed to avoid them.
“In the flesh.” He watched her face carefully as he spoke, a nervous frown playing on his lips. “What do you know about us?”
“Devil worshippers, blood sacrifices in your temples, that your old men like to send the young men off on missions so they can take all the young women as their brides.” She eyed him now, concerned.
“And? You’ve known me, really known me, for half a year almost. Do any of those sound true?”
“I couldn’t say. You seem like a standup guy, but the devil is a tricky fellow, or so I’ve been told.”
“True enough.” His frown deepened. “Have you not heard any good then?”
“To be honest, I don’t really listen much. Religion and I don’t really see a need for each other.”
“I will respect that, however, I need you to respect that my religion and I are integral to one another. If we have any hope of a true relationship, that has to be paramount.”
“Why? What does your religion have to do with me?”
William ran a hand through his hair, disheveling the careful disarray. “You see, there are some churches in the world where worship is a one-day in seven experience, or less. But then there are religions like mine, that believe the religion is merely a guideline to change the person. A path to becoming rather than a formality of hoops to jump through. I’m not perfect, but I try hard to live what I believe.”
“Okay, but I still don’t see what that has to do with me.”
He took a breath, stealing himself again. “You’d think after two years of teaching this to others that I’d know what to say myself, but I’m struggling here. Okay, how about we read a scripture, do you mind?”
When she nodded uncertainly, he grabbed for a thick book and flipped it open to the middle. After scanning just a second he turned to a new section and found his spot. “Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. Now, let’s combine that with one more: Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.”
He kept the book open, leaning it outward in case she wanted to look at it herself. Lilly stared from the book to him. His intent demeanor proved his desire to help her understand, but she wasn’t quite grasping his purpose. “So, sex is bad, or sex is good, I can’t tell from those two.”
“Sex is great, when used properly. It has a purpose, just like everything else in the world. That’s gotten confused quite a bit in recent years, but I won’t sleep with you, or even come close to sleeping with you for now. Can you respect that?”
“Or else you go to hell.” She was beginning to piece together a little of his parent’s conversations with him.
“Not as such, but it thwarts my ability to receive the promises mentioned in the verse I read to you. You see, my religion believes that a connection with God is essential to everything we do. Break that connection, and we lose a lot more than a good listener on the other end of the line.” He puffed out his cheeks and stared at her, letting the breath out slowly. “I’m going way over your head, aren’t I?”
“A bit. I get the idea though. Sex is bad, but apparently kissing is okay. You aren’t a devil worshipper, but you still may or may not sacrifice animals and virgins in your temples.”
“Only the ones the old men don’t steal to make a part of their harem.” He added dryly. “Seriously though, no we don’t do any of those things that you mentioned. The temple is a university for the soul. We go there to be educated and enlightened, to meditate, pray, and complete vicarious work for those we love so that the family of God can reunite after the purposes of this world have been fulfilled.”
“Are you one of those doomsday groups that’s going to all walk into the ocean one day?”
William laughed, seemingly relieved at her willingness to joke. “If we did, we’d probably cause a flood that would take out a good chunk of the remaining continents. There are more than sixteen million of us, worldwide.”
“Okay. I think I’m on the same page.” She leaned forward for another kiss, flicking out her tongue the same way she had during their first kiss.
“Mmm, no tongue either. I know that sounds odd, and maybe this is just me, but your tongue does things to me that I’m not strong enough to handle.”
“So why resist? Isn’t life about having a little fun? Too stodgy means you’ll die young.” Her fingers walked up his chest until he caught her hand.
“Life is about joy, not fun.” He corrected. “One is short-term, the other long. Think of it like preparing for a race. If I want to race in a one kilometer event, but I only every run one kilometer at a time, what are my chances of winning?”
“I fail to see how that relates to kissing.”
“Because I’m not looking for a quick fix, Lilly.” He pulled her hand into his. “You wrote the name Mrs. Doughan all over your notebook. Can I take that to mean that at one time you fancied the idea of becoming my wife?”
It was her turn to shift uncomfortably.
“You don’t really have to answer that, but I’ll be honest. I want a wife, not a girlfriend. So I’m going to treat you with the same level of respect and honesty that I hope to have in my marriage, all the while knowing that if it doesn’t work out, I want no regrets. What if, for instance, you meet my best friend and suddenly realize that Mrs. Doughan sounds droll and pathetic compared with Mrs. Clancy.”
“Your best friend’s last name is Clancy?”
“Don’t sidetrack. Let’s say you fall madly in love with him and you two end up married. Now, that’s going to put a bit of a strain on our relationship, I’ll admit, but I think we could eventually move past it. However, what if I’ve slept with you, or we’ve done some heavy making out and petting or other intimate things. At that point, there’s not really a way I can salvage the relationship with my best friend, especially if he knows about it.”
“I think that’s illogical. Time heals many wounds. There are plenty of people in the world who hook up and then move on, and it could be jumping from one boyfriend to their best friend.”
“True enough, I’ll grant you that, but not in my world. That’s what I mean. My mind works a bit differently than your average human. For me, those sort of intimate things are just that: a special treat only for my future wife. If that’s not you, then you don’t get to participate, and I don’t want to be the one who spoils that for someone else.” He held up a hand as her mouth opened to retort. “This isn’t an argument so much as me explaining to you what I’m thinking and why I’m doing what I’m doing. I give you full permission to utterly disagree with me, but while we’re dating, I want you to respect my choices just like I’ll do my best to respect yours.”
“What if my choice is to break down those barriers and help you loosen up?” She waggled his arm playfully.
“Then we’re done dating.” His eyes remained serious. “I don’t know anything about your past, Lilly, and I don’t need to. I will present myself as clean as I can make me to my wife as the only true gift that I can offer her aside from my heart.”
“So, you look down on those who aren’t virgins?”
“Again, everything I’m saying is for me alone. Whether you’re a virgin or not, I’m going to treat you the same: as a child of God who deserves reverence and respect from me in every facet of who you are. Physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.”
“I think your message would be completely sweet and wonderful if I believed like you. To me, it sounds like a giant waste of time and effort. You can still respect someone even if you’re not married to them, and sex expresses attraction and love.”
“That is a very small part of what it does. It’s the only part that most people focus on in our day, but I promise you that there’s more to it.”
“How would you know, you’re a virgin!” The whole conversation made her ill. “Alright, well, I think that’s enough for one night. Thanks for dinner, William, and thanks for a fun day. Tell Rob and his boys that I really appreciated their help.”
She rose and collected her things, then retrieved her suitcase from the back room. The whole time she wanted nothing more than to bolt, especially when William waited by the front door.
“Lilly, please don’t leave like this.” He caught her arm as she reached for the door. “Give me a month. Just let me lead for a month and if you can’t stand it, then we’ll be done.”
“Look, William, you didn’t want anything to do with this relationship from the beginning. Ending it now shouldn’t even phase you.”
“The choice is yours. I won’t drag you back, but I am very interested in trying.”
“You could have just said no sex before we’re married. Explaining it the way you did showed me how egotistical your religion must be.”
William sighed. “Then I explained it wrong. I’m sorry.”
He opened the door and watched her hurry to her car. Lilly could still see his silhouette as she turned the corner and sped away.
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